Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Hanging in there!

I thought I would be posting about our swift entry into civil registry, but I am not. I am waiting to post about our entry into civil registry:) Once again I am the recipient of the "Hang in there" comment of encouragement. I am keeping my eyes on Jesus. He knows how long I need to hang in there. I am reminded of a playground I took my daughter to a few days ago. It had one of those hanging runner tracks that you hold on to the bars and glide down to the other end (and back again if you can keep a good grip). I lifted my daughter up to the bars(she couldn't quite jump as high as it was), and gave her a gentle push. There she went, back and forth a few times before her grip gave way and she came down only to ask me to lift her back up to try again. Hmmm. A good lesson in that for me. God knows how long my grip will hold, and He gives me rest when I cannot hang on any longer. He also knows that when I try again, I will hold on a little tighter, a little longer, because He has encouraged me.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Modern Day Miracles

I am sorry I have been remiss on posting lately, but I have a very good excuse:) I have been witnessing a MIRALCE!!! (I have been sent a picture of said miracle on!!)
The look on this precious child's face mirrors mine. I see pure joy! Thank you Jesus!

The praise and glory go to GOD!!! He used His mighty power and orchestrated all of this before time began. I may have been in the dark, (actually I spent many days in darkness), about His plans, but I was constantly reminded that His ways are not our ways, and His plans are not our plans. His ways are, after all, so much better than ours!! He has chosen to bless our family with the privilege of raising this beautiful child. I am so humbled by His Divine mercy. I have so much to learn about God and His ways!! But for now, I will "bask in the Son" for giving me the gift of a daughter:)

Friday, July 11, 2008

Milestones

Throughout our adoption process, we counted milestones. Some were so very exciting!! These were signing the contract with AGCI, mailing off the dossier, being put on the waiting list, getting "the call' for referral, seeing those first precious pictures of our daughter, visiting her for the first time, holding her for the first time, getting DNA, getting PA from USE, getting IN to PGN.....

Some milestones were more difficult. Getting past the DNA glitch( USE wouldn't accept transferred DNA), getting kicked out of PGN twice, the second time on her first birthday, getting caught up in the CA mess...twice, missing her first birthday...

Other milestones are just now happening. These are the saddest of the sad. On June 26th we "celebrated" our one year anniversary of getting "Y's" referral. Today we celebrate the one year anniversary of the day we traveled to Guatemala for our visit trip. Tomorrow will mark one year from the time we first held our new little daughter in our arms. We were so full of hope and anticipation of bringing her home. HH was wonderful. We had a picture perfect time. We totally fell in love with this small child who lives so very far away. She felt like she was mine.

AGCI always reminds us to "guard our hearts". After all, anything can happen with international adoption. I would like to know how anyone can do that. I simply cannot fathom entering into this process with a guarded heart. Where my children are concerned, I am fully vested. Heart, mind and soul. Guarding my heart means not feeling or growing in love. When I think about this, I bring to mind words that a very wise woman once told me as we were embarking on foster care. We asked about loving these children who would be with us, and then having to let them go. She said very simply," No one ever died from loving a child." How true that is. Our hearts will always be affected by these tiny beings who come into our lives. Whether they are there for a few days or for a lifetime, we should love them completely. Maybe the reason they are placed with us is so that we WILL love them. After all, who needs love more than they do?

I love you my sweet, Y. You will always be the daughter of my heart. No one can take the love I have for you away. It is mine to keep, yet keeping it is loss, not gain, therefore I give it to you. You will never be without me in your life. My love for you will always remain. No matter what. You may depend upon it. I may not be holding you in my arms right now, but know for certain that I hold you daily in the arms of my heart.

Hugs and squeezes from Momma

Alright already!!

Have you ever been yelled out by God? Well, sometimes I get yelled at. Today was one of those days. .(Kind of gives you insight in to the hardheaded, impatient person I am.) Really, I didn't know that my wandering eye was causing wandering thoughts. Should I take matters into my own hands? I could just speed up this whole thing! I could just do this, and then it would be decided. Future chosen. Choices made. Done.
A little background for you , so it doesn't sound like I am rambling...OK...I AM rambling, but isn't that what my blog is for?? :)
I was told to check out AGCI's new web page. It was great! As I was checking out the countries available to adopt from, I went to India. As I was looking at all of the pictures of the beautiful children, I wondered if I should switch countries, and just go on with an adoption of another child. Maybe two. A girl and a boy. Get the ball rolling. After all, these kiddos are beautiful! These kids need a home. I have time right now to do a new dossier. I could be like Nike and "Just Do It!"
Well, I went as far as to e-mail AGCI about a picture I saw on the website.
That is when it happened!! The YELLING I mean. I sat down at my kitchen table to do my morning reading/prayers/reflections. After an opening gratitude prayer, I picked up my Streams in the Desert book. OUCH! My ears were scorched!! The reflection was about Elijah and the brook, as it dwindled and dried up. God sent Elijah there. (Hmm, my situation in Guatemala, perhaps.) He stayed put, Elijah I mean, even with the circumstances being what they were, until the Lord spoke to him. (UH-OH! Could it be that the circumstances in Guatemala are causing me to panic a bit? Am I becoming anxious, and want to make other plans before God speaks?) Am I devising another plan, long before the brook dries up, and asking God to bless it, and heading elsewhere? (Paraphrased from the reflection.)
"God will often extricate us from the mess we have made(was I about to make a mess of things?), because "His love endures forever". "YET" (oooooooohhhhh, that word is powerful!) if we will only be patient and wait to see the unfolding of HIS plan, we will never have to turn back and retrace our way, with wasted steps...." (Again, paraphrased.)
Then , in the very last line in the reflection, in italics none the less (so I wouldn't miss it), came a VERY LOUD voice, saying..."Wait for the LORD". Patiently wait! (Psalms 27) I went and read the whole Psalms after that !!
Oh, I am to be patient and wait some more?!
Yes, Lord. I will quit my wandering eye. I will allow it only to look heavenward. I will await your command. As the brook dries up, I will try my best not to be fearful of what I see, I will see the circumstances through your eyes, for you see so much more that I do.

Amen.

Monday, July 7, 2008

More Encouragement!

I can always use more encouragement!! Can't you? :)
AnyHoo, one of my favorite verses for encouragement during our adoption wait has been Habakkuk 2:3
For the vision still has its time, presses on to fulfillment, and will not disappoint;
If it delays, wait for it, it will surely come,it will not be late.

I was reading on the 4th of July (OK,OK, I do a lot of reading!!), in my Streams in the Desert book, and low and behold!!! God had placed that very verse right there to remind me that He is still working for our adoption!! Thank you ,Jesus!! You always know when I need some "inside" comment that will satisfy my need for confirmation that you are still working on my behalf!! Just wanted to be sure we were both on the same page:)
What an awesome God we serve!!
He also sent me another verse,(yes, I was STILL reading!), and that AGCI quotes a lot in their literature. Jeremiah 29:11
For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope.
I just love it when God sends me encouragement!!
Praising God for all He does!! God is good, ALL the time:)

Encouragement

I have been praying very diligently lately for many things. One thing especially is for encouragement. I have found God's word to be very helpful (like, duh!)!! Also, a devotional book that a friend gave me titled,"Streams in the Desert" has been a great complement to my morning prayer time.
About a week ago, as I was once again reflecting on the situation in Guatemala and with our adoption, I was praying especially hard about the path we have chosen to take, and was asking God to make it clear to me we were where He wanted us to be.
I read a quote from the book I mentioned, by a man named Matthew Henry, who said,"We can depend on God to fulfill His promise, even when all of the roads leading to it are "closed"." This was a very powerful message, because we all know Guatemala is CLOSED right now. God WILL fulfill His promise!! Now, "when" is another question I have been asking:)

Can you say BUSY??

Thanks for stopping by! I have been a bit remiss in updating my little blog lately. Please forgive me!! I have been quite busy of late, and will fill you all in on the details...I know how we all like the details!!LOL!
First of all , my oldest son left yesterday to tour with his band. They are headed for Detroit!! I know they will have a great time, but this old groupie will miss him terribly:)
Second, my youngest son is headed for Germany tomorrow!! Can you say, "We haven't packed a thing!!!!" Nothing like procrastinating to make life a bit more exciting:) He will have a wonderful time, and I am so happy we were able to send him. I think international travel is a great opportunity for our young men. We were able to send our middle son to Japan a couple of years ago. He was amazed at the different culture, and wants to return someday.
My middle son and I have been shopping for his dorm room at UAB. What fun it is to watch him pick out all the things that will make his space feel like home away from home. While we were shopping, we ran across a friend we know from church (an older couple) and the husband said,"Why didn't you just give him a couple hundred bucks and let him shop by himself?" I looked at him and said,"What fun would that be? This way I get the pleasure of his company, and he gets "extras" because I am here!" I found that to be so true. There are so few moments where I get to be alone with just one of my older boys. I love to spend one-on-one time with each of them. They are all so very charming, and handsome, and sweet. They like to shop with me, get a coffee with me, or sneak out for a nice lunch with the "Momma"!! How cool is that??!