Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Longing.....


Good Morning out there!!
I have been trying to update this blog of mine for a few days, and finally have a minute to do so. I will probably need to make two entries, but we'll see ;-)
First of all, I want to put your minds at ease. We have heard absolutely nothing in the past 30 days about our case. Nada. Zip. Our wait continues...
Now on to my title of this post...LONGING. I once read a statement that said, "Stop longing, and start living." Those words meant a lot to me at the time. I took them to heart, and picked myself up off of the floor, and swept the "poor me" attitude out of my head. I started living day by day, in the here and now, keeping my longing at bay. That worked very well for me. It helped me tremendously when I needed to be present in the present.
Then there is the elapsed time...we come to today. Here I am still living in the present( for the most part), very hopeful of the future, and WHAM!!! I was reading a reflection from St. Jude. (I just love St. Jude. He is such a powerful patron saint, and friend of Jesus. I love how he talks with Jesus, and reminds Him of all I keep praying about. You see, I pray, then I put St. Jude on the job of pestering Jesus about answering my prayers. Jesus loves His friend, and will honor that friendship. It is a win/win situation :-) That is my secret!! Oh, of course I always involve The Blessed Mother Mary, too. After all, God the Father told us to "Honor thy Mother and they Father" , so if Mother Mary is asking Jesus to do something, He, as her son, very well cannot refuse to honor her!! I just keep reminding Jesus in my prayers that His Mother needs to talk with Him about me :-)
Anyway...on to what I read today about longing.

Day 29 -- March 25th

We take a moment this twenty-ninth day of Lent to reflect with contrition and resolve:

Accept your longings. Know that the desires of the heart are always with us, and we must learn to live with them in peace. With the changing of the seasons comes renewed hope.

Please send your special intentions for Lent to the National Shrine of St. Jude today.


OK, so now I have to live with my longings, not stop them??? As I reflected on this, I realized that that is just what I am doing. My longing to bring my daughter home is always with me, however, I have learned to live in peace with this longing. Until she is under my roof, I will have this longing. It is not going anywhere. It will one day be replaced with other longings. Not longings for her presence, because she will be here with me, but new longings for the fulfillment of the wonderful life that God has planned for her.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Marching On

Encouragement.
I love to get and give it, so I will share some with you today.

A verse from Hebrews 3:14. We have come to share in Christ if we hold firmly til the end the confidence we had at first.

I pondered this over and over. I thought about the confidence I had in the beginning of our adoption process. I had LOADS of it. I started with such a sureness of heart and mind. I JUST KNEW the end result. A negative thought never crossed my mind. Why? Hmmm. I wonder why I felt that way? I answered myself. It was because of my communion with my Lord. He was guiding me. He was showing me the path He wanted me to go. He was dispelling all doubt and fear. WOW!!

What changed? Not my mind. Circumstances? They are always changing, aren't they? True there were ups and downs. There have been delays, and more delays, and obstacles, and shut-downs,and missed milestones and fingerprint renewals, and death itself even touched our lives. What about HIS mind? None of these things have changed His mind either. Did I hear His voice in the beginning? YES I DID! Do I still hear His voice? YES I DO! What do I think He is saying to me right now? He is saying, "The greatest challenge in receiving great things from God is holding on for the last half hour."
I really feel like this is the "last half hour".

I know I have walked the breadth of many valleys during this journey to my daughter. There have been many mountain top experiences too! There have been pictures and videos of the sweetest little girl in Guatemala. There were two times that I treasure the most, the times that I was actually with this precious daughter of mine, and was able to hold her close, and permeate as much love to her as I possible could. That miraculous day last summer when our case worker called to tell us our adoption could continue!! If that wasn't the Lord opening a door someone else tried to close, I don't know what is!! The Lord has been faithful to me. He has never once told me to quit. He has always kept us on track. He has never failed us, not once. My confidence that overflowed in the beginning is back in abundance!! The Lord is faithful, and will complete this wonderful work He has begun.