Summer Rain

Hellllloooo! I have missed you! Glad you could come for a visit:) I have been very busy lately, and will hopefully get updates on my blog about all of the good stuff!

Here is a quick pic of our little Summer Rain who went camping at Camp Cha-La-Kee with her Dadda, Chief Running Deer! They had a great time, and won many ribbons. Summer Rain won fishing trophies for Most Fish Caught, and Biggest Fish! We are very proud of her:) Now...if she will only learn to bait her own hook!LOL! EWWWWW! Worms!!

They were able to ride horses, as you can see, and that is a favorite activity!

Where was I? Oh, well, I was visiting my Momma and we were dining out and shopping, and chatting and driving all over looking for a Starbucks!! We finally found one..in the HOSPITAL!!! When I tell everyone that my mom and I went to the hospital on my last visit, they all ask "why"? I simply say,"For coffee, of course!" TEEHEE! As we left the hospital with our coveted beverages, my mom turns to me and very seriously asks,"Robin, can you drink and drive?" That one kept us laughing all the way home:)

I Go Before You Always

No picture this time. Only my heart speaking love and thanksgiving to my God who gives as well as takes away. The wait has been getting increasingly more difficult. I do not ever doubt that the promise will be fulfilled, but I do question what will be left of me when it is. Will I have spent all of myself in the struggle to find peace in the wait. I want to have so much left for her. She deserves it!
I was praying for God to guide my path, and lay before me the sure knowledge that He was responsible for my direction. At Mass on Sunday, I stood to take my place in the line that would bring me before His altar, before Him, and allow me the great privilege of receiving His precious body that was given up for me. The song playing for Holy Communion drifted over the pews. It flowed into my ears and stirred my heart as God used its soothing words to reassure me of His divine plan. The song that I joined in to sing through my tears was, "Be not afraid. I go before you always. Come follow me. And I will give you rest." This is the very song I named my blog after! Thank you Jesus for your personal relationship with me!!
Amen!

Happy Birthday Summer Rain!

Our daughter turned 9 years old on April 12th! We cannot believe how fast she is speeding toward double digits!! Please slow down my little princess!

For her birthday(that is her in the middle), she had two of her closest friends spend the night. Anyway, first we all went to the movies to see Nim's Island. It was a cute movie . Plenty of adventure! Then we went to the mall for some fun and girly shopping! We hit Libby Lu first for hair extensions and "Do's", and then on to Justice and Hallmark to check out the available WebKinz supplies! They didn't want to leave the shopping behind to go eat, so we dined in the food court, before making our final purchases. After a trip into Bath and Body works for a hand treatment and new lotions to try(and a few lip gloss choices), we made our way back to Justice to buy WebKinz. By night's end, the birthday girl's total supply of WebKinz had risen to 35(including what she had at home)!!! I ask? Is there such a thing as TOO MANY stuffies?? I THINK NOT!! Her pals enjoyed a new WebKinz ..or two...as well ;) Needless to say, the mall was closing when we headed home. When we got home, there were gifts to open for the birthday girl as well as gifts for the guests. They received cute crocheted purses stuffed with candy, lip gloss, nail jewelry, a new Barbie, and a new outfit for Barbie to change in to, a beaded necklace, and a punch ball! Fun was had by all, and the girly girls went to sleep snuggled next to their new stuffies...all of which had been properly named and registered on WebKinz World! Of course, they giggled quite a bit before settling in...it was after 1 am when their eyes closed for the night! Good thing I am a night person!LOL! Where was Wubby, you ask? Happy NOT to be with us on our excursion:) And, asleep before the rest of us!

The Front of Her Closet

Her Closet

Hmmmm. The first words that come to mind..."poorly lacking". That is what I think when I look into the armoire that will be our daughter's closet when she first comes home. Okay, Okay, I know. The travel pillow and picture frames are debris, and will have to go! Anyway, what this tells me is that I am about ready for some more retail therapy:) I have decided NOT to buy any more clothes until we exit PGN. SOOOO, Come on PGN and LET US OUT!! I did buy a diaper bag! One size fits all:) I love it!! It is in the corner on the left. It looks like a messenger bag, and is brown with pink trim. All of that "stuff" crammed in under the hanging clothes are hooded towels, wash cloths, bibs, shoes , socks, bottles, spoons, teethers, books, etc. I just buy stuff that is not size specific, and toss it in! Actually, I am not sure what all IS buried back there!!LOL! Hmmmm, I may need to take a look!

The Crib

Ah, the crib. It mocks me at times, seemingly laughing at my hopes and dreams. Constantly reminding me that it is empty as I walk by. It's silence making me painfully aware of the absence of the sweet baby girl that does not rest her dark-haired head on the tiny pink flowers that run across the sheets with abandon.

Ah, the crib. It stands as a sentinel to the homecoming of the child who will chew on its railings and bang on its walls. It knows it cannot possibly contain the one it holds....there will always be outstretched arms reaching deep within its confines to free the little one who at once seeks its protection and familiarity, and yet wishes to be out, so to be held and loved . The irony? That little one is held already. Not in the arms of her mother, but in her heart. She is also loved beyond anyone's comprehension. For how can we possibly understand with our limited knowledge, the depths of love that fill our hearts and beings.

Where is the Emphasis?

Today I found myself flipping through the pages of the calender. I am not looking for a scheduled event, but rather an UNscheduled event. I find some modicum of comfort in looking ahead to the imaginary date on which we will get to pick up our baby girl. Pitiful, I know.

The days lately seem endless, but the inquiring looks from others, sometimes keeps me indoors to avoid the barrage of disappointed stares. I actually had a mom I know apologize to me before asking about when our baby would get here. She did not want to cause me any more pain than I was already experiencing. I find it humbling to know that others suffer along with me during this wait.

Some common questions I have been thinking about.

"When will she come home?"

"I don't know."

"Why does it take so long?"

"I don't know."

"Don't they know this is a child?"

"I don't know."

As I look at these three questions, I reflect on the word on which the emphasis is placed. Hmmmm. When will she come home? "I" don't know, but my Lord does.

Why does it take so long? I "don't" know. If I did, I could explain it or maybe fix it.

Don't they know this is a child? I don't "know" anything about the people who God has placed in charge of my daughter's future. All I do know is that He has chosen very carefully all who will be involved in her paperwork, just as He has carefully chosen the family that will welcome her home when the time arrives.

I guess the lesson to learn is that the emphasis must be on GOD. He has all of the answers, even to the toughest questions. I can hear Him speaking to me , His child, as I ask these questions of Him. He is saying,"Because I said so!" I smile knowingly, because there are times when I have uttered these very words when speaking to my own children. Not because I don't want to answer them, but because the answer to their questions would be too far above their comprehension. Trust! It boils down to trust. We ask our children to trust us every day. God is asking me to trust Him in all things. Sometimes His will is too far above my comprehension.